Monday, February 2, 2015

Doctor Feel Good

Taking 3 kids to the doctor goes a little something like this.

Me:  Everyone sit, just sit.
Ashton (5):  Roman, don't cry when you get a shot.
Roman (2):  I don't wanna get a shot!

Me: Roman, you're not getting a shot.
Ashton:  It's ok, just be brave.
Roman:  Noooo!
Me:  Ashton, stop!  It's not even his appointment, it's you & PJ's check up.
Ashton:  And I have to get a shot?
Me:  You're gonna get a shot if you keep acting ugly.
Ashton:  What?!  *inaudible wail*

Me:  Stop, I'm kidding.  I mean, I'm not kidding.  I don't know if you have to get a shot, just calm down.
Roman:  What's this?
Me:  Roman, get out of the drawers.  Ashton, leave the baby alone.
Roman:  Can I see your phone?
Me:  My phone is not your toy.
Ashton:  What's this?
Me:  Give me that!  It's not a microphone, the doctor needs that to look in your ears.
Ashton:  My ears don't hurt.
Me:  I know, it's just...Roman, if you don't stop kicking that table, I'm going to kick you!
*door knob jiggles*
Doctor:  Hello?

Me:  Oh, I'm sorry.  The stroller makes it a little tight in here.  Hold on.
Doctor:  *through door crack*  Maybe you could...
Me:  Wait, I'll just move it a little...Roman sit down.
Doctor:  Well, here we are.  *stepping inside*  Hi guys!
Roman:  Mommy said she's gonna kick me.
Ashton:  And I'm only supposed to get a shot if I'm ugly.
PJ:  *perfect time to start crying*
Me: good to see you again doctor.  *pause* You're going to report this, aren't you.

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Playground rules apply: Speak the way you'd like to be spoken to and if you don't play nice, I'm kicking you off my monkey bars.