Monday, April 13, 2015

Speak Out

My 3 year old has become quite communicative when confronted with what he believes are egregious slights.  He's also learning that he has control over some of the things that happen to him.  It's all a normal part of growing up but it tickles (and sometimes irritates) me nonetheless to hear him speak out so eloquently.  Below is our most recent list of Roman's Words of Wisdom:
1-You care too much about my pee pee. To be fair, this is true. I have a strange preoccupation with human waste when I'm the one that has to clean it. When Poopy Surprise is no longer on the menu for me, I won't be so focused.

2-I want to be a robot princess today. I'm actually completely fine with this career aspiration. Robots are efficiency personified and princesses are known for the fashion stylings and diplomacy. I honestly see great things in his future by pairing the too.

3-It's not ok to put the blanket over the baby's face? For the record: It's not ok.  Not ever.

4-Don't take my boogers away, please don't take my boogers! This, in response to me washing his face before school and then finding two "visitors" had attached themselves to the cloth.  I went to rinse them off and he realized he'd be saying goodbye forever to friends he'd apparently grown close with overnight.

5-Pardon me for misbehaving, mother. A verbatim quote that further proves my theory that one of his personalities is a 40-something British gent named Nigel.

Look, I've got no idea where this kid came from but I just may keep him around...purely for entertainment purposes.

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Playground rules apply: Speak the way you'd like to be spoken to and if you don't play nice, I'm kicking you off my monkey bars.